iPod and Software Update Problems

I just updated my iPod with the software update. The updater tells me to
unplug it and plug it back in to finish the install, but it doesn't show in
iTunes, and when I try to eject it from the Finder, I get a message that the
disk is being used and I can't eject it. It is charging, and there is a
"spinning wheel" over to the left of where the little lock shows. What is
that?

Other problem is updated had 4 things to update. It finished the iPod
update, but part way through part 2 of the QuickTime update, it just stuck
and the hard drive spun like crazy until the iBook got so hot I force
quitted the updater.

Any thoughts?

Martha